Written by Bill Hempel, Member of the National Power Squadrons Marketing/Public Relations Committe and Assistant Safety Officer for the Peace River Squadron
Have you ever noticed that boaters seem to have their own language? “Open the port hole when you go to the head”. Why is the bathroom a head and why is the window a port hole? Boaters even make a muddle out of right and left. Left is port and right is starboard. How come a window on the right hand side isn’t called a starboard hole? Further they put lights on each side with red for port and green for starboard. (I always remember port is red because port wine is red). Instead of port and starboard why can’t we just call them red and green? That way you only have one set of names to remember.
Why is it that a rope becomes a line once you take it aboard a boat? And did you know that in boater’s eyes a rope (or line) has three parts. The end tied to the boat is the bitter end (I never tasted one to find out why) the end fastened to something else is called the working end, and the middle of the line is called the standing part. Now if the rope is tied to something else it certainly isn’t working and I never saw the middle of a rope standing! Why do they call it that? Boaters make it worse by calling ropes that become lines, halyards and sheets when they are on a sail boat. If a line used to secure something is short, it is then called a lanyard. If you use a line to tow a dinghy it then becomes a painter. And if you attach the line to an anchor it becomes a rode. I never painted my dinghy and I surely never rode an anchor! I never will figure those terms out. Fortunately a knot is just called a knot (or is that a boaters measure of speed?), but unfortunately in boaters terms the simple act of tying a knot is called marlinspike.
I can’t fathom why boaters measure depth in fathoms. Sounds like a term from Jules Verne’s under the sea adventures. And why is a boats speed measured in knots? “We are doing 28 knots”. Isn’t doing knots supposed to be called marlinspike?
When two boats are meeting bow to bow, the boat that has the right of way is called the “stand on vessel”. Now in my safety columns I always say “don’t stand on your vessel”. Does this mean if you don’t you would never have the right of way? Further, why is the front called a bow and the back called the stern? Maybe in ancient days they shot their bows and arrows off the front. And why is the side of a boat called a gunwale, and why is it pronounced gunnel? I just don’t get it!
The thing on the back that steers the boat is called a tiller. On the farm we tilled the soil but we called our tiller a plow. On boats a plow is a type of anchor. And how come on boats the guy that holds the tiller to steer is called the helmsman? Shouldn’t he be the “tillerman”.
Distance on boats is measured in nautical miles except on inland waters it is measured in statute miles. (Do you know how many statues there are to a mile?)Your location is measured in latitude and longitude. Even though these are distance measures, you read them off from scales (which I thought were for weight measurements). You find the scales on maps, but boater’s maps are called charts. And they tell me every chart has a rose for the compass. Now I like my compass but I never thought of buying it a rose. They tell me the rose is used to correct your compass. Why don’t they fix the compasses and save all those roses?
I just love the terms boaters use to describe where something is located on the boat. They use terms like abeam, aft, amidships, abaft and my all time favorite, athwartship. I feel like Thilvethter the puthycat when I thay athwartship.
I have an idea. Why don’t all of us go to the next boating class and drive the instructor nuts by asking him about these terms. Oh-oh, you will have to excuse me now, the bitter end of my painter is fouled on the bridle and my dinghy is heaving athwartship.
Written by Bill Hempel, Member of the National Power Squadrons Marketing/Public Relations Committe and Assistant Safety Officer for the Peace River Squadron. You may contact him at billmarl@comcast.net.